Help?

Does anyone know of a way to get my balls out of a Mason jar? I was teabagging one and fell which sent my testicles soaring at Mach speed towards the opening of the jar and now they’re stuck. I tried covering them in butter but all that did was get pubes in it. It hurts pretty bad and mom is going to be home in about 30 minutes. She caught me fucking a fish tank a few days ago and said she’d disown me if she caught me doing some weird shit like that again. I’m really in a pickle here and need your help. Thanks guys 🙂

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